All the World Loves a Lover and Other Marketing Tips Oct 11 25

This will be a short post today but I thought it was worth mentioning that a good marketing and ad campaign is essential for any product launch. Enter the 1970's MANDOM awesomeness.

Really, if you are looking for excellence in advertising, look no further. If you are looking for cologne that smells like gasoline, well, you're all set there too. Oh, and remember that "All the world loves a lover. Man o man, that's MANDOM!"

Ninja Quickstops- Have a Great Weekend! Aug 11 5

For those of you wondering what to do on a Friday night, there's always the old dress up in the usual ninja wear, grab a sword and hit the quicky mart for cigarettes and lotto tickets. See the ninja awesomeness awkwardness here. (For the record: I don't smoke. Or play the lotto. Yet.)

But I think the guy below has the right moves. If only we could get him the right outfit.

Seagulls are, and have always been, the ultimate ninjas.

Weekend, out!

xoxo, Your Ninja

Little Ninja: Don't Be Sad, Be Awesome Jun 11 15

Just a little ninja inspiration for today: Starting up in today's economy can be tough, even for the most bad ass of ninjas. Corporate paper is drying up, everyone is short on time as they need to do more with vanishing resources and it's hard to get a soapbox when there's so much signal to noise in a saturated marketplace. I get it. I've been there. And I've fought my way out. You can too as there's wisdom to be had. Take Barney Stinson's advice from How I Met Your Mother: "When I get sad I stop being sad and be awesome instead."

Let that be your battle cry and just get started. Never take sad for an answer.

Do Nice Guys Finish Last? Confessions from the Marketing Trenches Mar 10 12

When my current company was getting started we had a marketing budget of $500. Total. That's $500.00 USD. No, really: $5-0-0. And no, the rest of the money was not spent on Aeron chairs, like many startups in the day.

 

We had to come out swinging against the 500 lb gorillas of our industry. While we held the edge in tech, call recording systems of any brand were hardly a household name. There were a few that were of note, with the biggest being Nice Systems and Dictaphone. 

 

Nice was an older player that built their business upon several key acquisitions. This added a lot of punch to the Rolodex and established sales channels, albeit causing brand diffusion and occasional confusion. But, like Borg, they were everywhere and tech budgets were being assimilated, left and right.

  

One of the keys to their later success is the truth to the arguments that no one ever gets fired for specifying IBM. They’re big. They’re entrenched. They have marketing budgets (shockingly) in excess $500. A Nice solution wasn’t likely to get you fired, due to the sheer size and halo effect that comes with the beast. Of course, no one can get hired solely based on something like that either.

 We stood out in our ability to offer one-on-one technical service and pre and post purchase support. Our interface was, and indeed still is, simply powerful enough to allow users to record and monitor calls, run meaningful reports and track users and groups, while gathering customer-interaction intelligence within a  single user friendly application. Single and multi-site call centers rapidly adopted Voxida, our call recording platform, and there still wasn't a grey suit- or a canned solution- offered by any of our team members. We operated with a mantra of keeping call recording cool. Because, really, it should be.

So, we "got" the web and search engine optimization (SEO) right away. When most companies were working on brochure-ware sites, and the more saavy of those bought Google AdWords, we focused on organic search when it will still the ugly step child. Admittedly, we got around the budgeting hurdle by allowing most leads to come to us via word-of-mouth, industry news and organic searches for specific technology, like a call recording system that works specifically with an Avaya S8700 PBX with digital and VoIP phones. As engineered, Voxida could speak multiple vendors proprietary PBX languages when much of the industry was still relying on simple call events and noise-driven recording modalities. And Voxida could do it out-of-the-box.

 

So, when it comes down to the question "do Nice guys finish last?" we're still offering a shrug. The only certain thing is that it's way too good to be one of the naughty.

 

Join us at work or at play.

Smallest StartUp I've Signed On For: Etsy Featured Sellers with 8 Toes Aug 09 13

I've been roped into some wacky business ideas. But, this one is the weirdest by far.

It earns the distinction of being the only gig I've ever done where all the cofounders have eight toes. And are cockatoos. These feathered folks have their own shop on Etsy that's "Parrot Run, Ocean Approved" and sells beach glass jewelry, ocean items, beauty products. And the little weasels give 100% of Net Profits to charities that rescue parrots, which means that my founder stock is worth, in practical terms, a big fat zilch.

Etsy is the biggest online marketplace devoted to selling handmade products. You can see more about Etsy in the Press here. 

When the cockatoos of WildPen were contacting by Etsy about doing a video about their artistic process, they said "as long as there's going to be some rock and roll...."And Etsy delivered on that.

View the WildPen parrot's video on Etsy and baffle yourself on how/why I got involved with these guys. :)

 

You can also read more about this little Wildpen startup on Etsy here and keep up with the cockatoos on their beach parrot blog.

Sales Staffing for Ninjas: Tech Startups Considerations Aug 09 3

Any startupeer knows that sales= snappy new tabi boots. Oh, and survival. It's time to look at how you should, could and really need to sell. (If you are a geek/engineer founder, especially take note!)

When I looked into selling for fun and profit, and yet again, had to give props to Dharmesh Shaw at OnStartups.com. (I wonder if he's part ninja as well....?) See his Building Startup Sales Teams blog entry.

 

I could not agree with all the points more. Having done more than my fair share of tech start ups, mostly founded, run and maintained by engineers and the rest of us geeky types, I see a common, related- and sometimes fatal- mistake. It is far too easy to let the new sales person tail wag the dog. Just to get this out of the way, let me state the obvious: No sales person, or any UFO, will save you. It's not that easy. Suck it up and let's look at where you really stand.

Even though the founders do grok the product, the market, how they are going to save the world, jump over buildings in a single bound, etc., there is still a tendency to think that sales people know much more about sales, and to equate it to a dark art. Once sales people get in place, the founders forget that they were pimping the product way before the it was stable, feasible or that they were able to pay the overdue electricity bill. I have fallen into this amnesia trap many, many times.

While sales people and rainmakers often play big a part in the evolution of a startup, there's not just one way to get the job done. And we need to remember that. Our agility got us this far, no?

But, when you do find the sales partner that you need, like any core team member, you better be ready to run errands for them and pick up their kids from school. I build businesses like family. It is work but it works. Sure, there's a lot of yelling and borrowing each other's cars, and it takes some skill and lots of patience, but I'm just saying that if you decide to get married, don't leave 'em at the altar. In our out, buddy. You wouldn't want your new sales person/team to do that to your customers, would you? A startup, like all areas of seeming impossibility, needs love.

Just don't let it be a shotgun marriage. Nothing is dire and you're far from knocked-up. Really, always remember that, as a startupeer, you are already one part idiot and one part superhero.

Just do what you've must to get these sales in the bag. And, just like adopting new team members, it's best to be ready to feed and water your new sales as well.

But enough from me. I'm off to go marry Voxida, Accurate Always' communication recording system, to another little/big call center that could.

By all means, keep starting up!  -kate

 

Aviators By Design and Assistance by Necessity: The Case of the Little Startup that Could May 09 10

I have to confess that I'm a sucker for an underdog. And I'm amazed by what people accomplish when they do not know what can't be done. This post is dedicated to the birds, an the startup, that really inspire.

Parrots, the ultimate aviators, have been plucked from the trees and smuggled into the country. Here they are sold and change hands constantly. There has been a huge industry push to crank out more of these guys, as parrots, behind dogs and cats, are the most popular "pet" in America. To wit, every year approximately 350,000 companion parrots find themselves without a home.

Parrots scream, self mutilate, bite and have other destructive behaviors that commonly crop up far before they have a shot at getting real help. They are often beaten, neglected, euthanized, "released," left in small cages with limited access to fresh food and clean water. I wish it wasn't true- but trust me- it can get ugly.

(Not that the fellow below, at the Save Haven Parrot Sanctuary, is ugly. Actually, he's a looker but you should have seen him when he came in after getting multiple injuries from a tangle with a ceiling fan.)

Sometimes the best these parrots can do is to make it to a sanctuary, often via a referral from the Humane Society, who's not equipped to handle the needs of parrots. There's no way around it; a very special place, with very special people, is needed for the care of these aerobats, dive bombers and Amelia Earhart's in their own right. Luckily, many have found a home with one of the best fledgling non-profits that I've seen in a while.

Safe Haven Parrot Sanctuary, Inc. is a startup in the truest sense. No, you won't see Aeron chairs, VCs or painful PowerPoint presentations. This is the real, grass-roots, deal.

It started with one woman. I think of her as the Rosie the Riveter of the Avian-inclined. Frankly, all the nights I slept under my desk over the years are a cake-walk compared to what she does before I get close to stumbling towards the espresso machine. If I was reviewing her operations plan, I'd see "working her ass of to do the best she could by these birds" was the idea. And I'd say there's no freakin' way this would fly.

But, it did. Word spread and now there are in excess of 100 parrots, now served daily, out of her sheer determination, love and grit.

Safe Haven Parrot Sanctuary is simply, honestly dedicated to the care and safety of unwanted parrots. That's their corporate mission, mantra and vision in one nice little, but hugely difficult, package. They provide the high quality care, even love, that's desperately needed for parrots that have lost their home for whatever reason.

From a business stand-point, they know their niche. They specialize in parrots that are not adoptable due to abuse, physical deformity and related challenges, and/or overall behavioral problems.

The barrier to entry in this market is high, as you'd have to be crazily devoted to have your ears blown out on a daily basis, while serving orange wedges. Round the clock feedings and emergency veterinary care requirements arise just when you think you can catch a few zs. (Ok, so I know a little about this too.)

Their profitability plan is iffy. And amazing. 100% of the money donated goes directly to the parrot care. Yes, really. A single salary from an outside gig pays for everything else. Efficient? Yes. Focused? Hella.

Any real hope, like any soon-to-be successful business, all comes down to a call to action.

Safe Haven provides natural living spaces for parrots that are as close to their native homes as possible. Learn by example while donating and saving these parrots from an uncertain future. They need your support to provide these cheeky fellas with the environment they so richly deserve. See Safe Haven now. Accurate Always is a supporter of Safe Haven and they'd look great on your personal or corporate donation list too. Of course, all donations, while karmically sound, are also fully tax deductible.

 

 

Assassins, Ninjas and On-the-Job Training May 09 4

I've been getting some heat around the office about how you (yes, you!!!!) can become a ninja. Like I'm giving that up. At least not in this post.

I can give a tip: I always suggest starting with the easy stuff first, like hiding in broad daylight and blending in. And I'm not the only one.

I haven't played a video game in and eon or two. That said, a very kind colleague sent me a link to a Real Life Assassin's Creed video. Get loaded and check it out.

Torture Memos: Just hum a few bars and you're a marketing genius! Apr 09 23

I have been thinking about the extreme importance of zigging where they zag, doing where they dolt, and marketing the hell out of it all. And, babe, let me tell you, it ain't easy to sell a concept that is still in Alpha, or worse, when the concept is so young that it's still learning the alphabet. Yet, whatever stage company, or product rev, you are in, it really all comes down to creativity and feeling. And sometimes a little musical intervention.

But, I'm getting ahead of myself. First, let me better identify the role of a marketer. Strangely, folks still confuse marketing with selling. While the two should be comfortable sharing a sandwich now and then, they still have their own houses to keep in order. 

Get this: marketers take products to, you guessed it, market. They throw a lot of weight around and determine price, placement, positioning, market segmentation, how to make their numbers look better for VC pitches, and do many other Very Important Things.

Sales aces let marketing kick the leads in and work within given product launch plans, break new accounts and are the natural schmoozers. They generally range from the "Heroes for the customer class!" or "Just plain used car annoying"  in the Ninja Success Spectrum, or the "NSS" as we like to affectionately call it here.

Marketeers are my favorites, at least until some sales guy sends me a convincing tee-shirt (hint: size sm, color black), so let's talk about the art of marketing some more. 

Now, there are often opportunities to find new ways of looking at things and educating your market as such. Take waterboarding. You could sell on the entertainment side but it's still going to get messy and the message muddled. (Trust me, I know: I had similiar challenges when doing contract gigs years ago, but I was young and needed the money....) But, now, I can say with 100% confidence that this is a perfect example of where a little jingle clears up an uncomfortable memo. 

Take it away Jonathan Mann! And, by all means, hire this guy for any major product launch campaign, customer-facing torture projects or the neighbor's kid's birthday party.

Lunar cycles and killing spree connection in common ninja behavior? Apr 09 10

I've felt like howling all day. Is it the work? Is it thinking about startups? Is it a intense, deeply personal issue that needs years of therapy? Who knows.

I think it's the moon. My theory is that ninjas have to be bad sometimes. Possibly, like me, all will use any excuse for bad behavior, especially one that involves werewolves (or zombies, for that matter.)

Of course, a sample size of one, while convenient, is a bit sparse. So, I'm openly testing and polling to data mine and support evaluate my theory that moon phase X = increased ninja activity. See below, comment or drop me a line if blood feuds are on the rise in your organization at a given lunar stage.

lunar phase